Rules for using the Self-Checkout Lane

Posted by on Sunday, November 13, 2011

(alternatively titled "Get the Eff out of MY WAY!")


One would think that when you enter the self-checkout lane of a grocery store, you're going to get out of the store quicker.

HA!

Jokes on those that think that is true!

So I've come up with a list of rules for those even thinking of checking out through the self-checkout lane...

- if you have so many groceries that you're using a cart, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you were born before the advent of the first computer, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you are using coupons, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if it takes your family of three to figure out how to scan a can of soup, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you don't know how to insert your chip debit or credit card in the debit machine, get out of the self-checkout lane
- alternatively if you don't know how to follow the "stripe to the left" instructions on the debit machine, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you're using cash, and can't find the "hole" to stick your bills, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you have something without a bar code on it (normally clothing or other household goods), get out of the self-checkout lane
- if your IQ is smaller than your shoe size, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you think the key to the machine reading your barcode is to smush it into the scanner, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you can't search for your vegetable/fruit/baked good "code" within 10 seconds, get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you keep removing your bags from the carousel and can't figure out why the computer keeps telling you to "put the bags back in the bagging area", get out of the self-checkout lane
- if you want to squabble about the price of a bottle of Coke (aka, price check!), get out of the self-checkout lane

Please note that this list isn't exhaustive, and may be added to periodically.

For those that continue to use the self-checkout lane... please treat them just like the express lane... 12 items or less.

Much appreciated.

One Comment

  1. I hate the self check out lane - it always ends up being so angry at me for ... I don't know, bringing my own bag, or it freezes halfway through the payment process.I generally refuse to use them.

    ReplyDelete